Learning Early To Judiciously Say ‘No’ Often Produces Better Care
Toward furthering the goal of education for Alzheimer’s patient Caregivers, this Page is structured to offer additional insights for your consideration. These insights come from people who, while not necessarily noted Professionals in the Medicinal field, nevertheless offer important information vis a vis their often Expert ‘hands on’ participation with Alzheimer‘s victims.
Marlo Sollito offers some excellent insights and observation concerning a topic with which most Caregivers of an Alzheimer’s victim from time to time struggle.
Alzheimer’s Caregiver’s Information
Marlo Sollito
advises people
How to say No…
DISCLAIMER: This information is offered purely as a prompt suggesting the reader take whatever appropriate steps he or she deems necessary in order to acquire more complete education pertinent to Alzheimer’s Disease. To the best of my knowledge, any and all statements throughout this website have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration, the AMA or any medical professional other than the author of the piece you might read or watch. Any suggestions made or product identified on this website are not intended to diagnose, treat, cure or prevent any disease.
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How to Say ‘No’ to Caregiving
by Marlo Sollito, Contributing Editor.
Marlo assists with the editorial direction of and AgingCare.com… including researching and writing articles and creating content on all aspects of elder care. Serving as a contributing editor since AgingCare.com’s inception in 2007, her goal is to provide quality information that is engaging, informative and supportive. She has more than 15 years of experience as a writer, editor and journalist. Her work has appeared in newspapers, magazines and websites focusing on health care, gerontology, consumer goods and business. Marlo has a Bachelor of Arts degree in Journalism and Mass Communications from Kent State University.
By nature, caregivers are nurturing people who put other’s needs before their own. But how can you set limits without feeling guilty? Where do you draw a line and say “I can do this much and no more”?
Cindy Laverty is a caregiver advocate, founder of The Care Company and The Cindy Laverty caregiving talk show. “Caregiving can last for years. It can take over your life if you let it. Most of us didn’t plan on being a caregiver, and never thought about the issues or the time commitment involved,” says Ms. Laverty, a former caregiver herself.
Being able to say ‘No’ can save you from emotional and physical burnout, and open up opportunities of shared caregiving responsibilities while deepening your relationship with your elderly loved one. Here are five tips from Ms. Laverty to manage your caregiving role:
Evaluate
Have an honest, realistic talk with yourself – the earlier in your caregiving journey, the better. Ask yourself how much of a commitment you are willing and able to make? Get clear about what you can do – and what you will do. Caregiving is not a one-person job. After you’ve come to terms in your own mind, get your parent on board and have a family meeting, before a crisis arises.
Prioritize
Those who know how to manage their own personal life fare best as caregivers. Ms. Laverty says, “Knowing what matters most in your life helps you put things into context,” Ms. Laverty says. “This is your final journey with someone you love. How do you want that journey to look? How do you want your life to look at the end of the journey? Do you want your marriage intact? Do you want to maintain your career? You don’t have to do everything, and you shouldn’t do everything. Caregiving is one component of your life.”
Set Boundaries
In her own experience and her work with other caregivers, Ms. Laverty has realized, “Many seniors become narcissistic and self-absorbed,” she says. “All that matters is that their needs being met immediately. They demand and demand more. At some point you’re going to have to say ‘I can’t do that right now.’ Set boundaries and stick to them. Don’t become an indentured servant.”
No is OK
Prioritize
Learning how to say one little word – no – can make a world of difference. “You might think, ‘I can’t say no to mom.’ But your mom probably said no when she was taking care of you as a child. “Sometimes in life, the answer has to be no,” Ms. Laverty says.
Get Help
If you are a caregiver who has taken on too much, understand that you cannot fix all that is wrong. Speaking to a professional – a counselor or a caregiving advocate can help get your life back on track. “Don’t just stay on a runaway train. Once you get to the point of complete overwhelm, you will ruin your health, destroy your relationships, or just walk away. Get help before you reach the breaking point,” she says.
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